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Nov. 17th, 2011


kerrys_neurons

short changed shortbread

This weekend I am going to a party and I planned on bringing decorated cookies, and two cakes. Yeah, I know that's a lot for a potluck but since I am an unemployed trained baker, I figure I can get some commissions out of it.

Today I began by making the shortbread cookies. (Shortbread is awesome with royal icing decorations FYI) I was going to use the shortbread recipe we used in my baking program but I realized it was ounces and I don't have a food scale. (That is not officially on my Christmas list now.) So I Googled. I found a recipe for English Shortbread which is what I was after. Scottish shortbread is slightly different. Anyways, its three ingredients and super easy. Basically 3 steps. Cream butter and sugar. Mix in flour. Bake. So I mix the ingredients, and its gotta sit in the fridge for at least an hour. When it was sitting in the fridge, I realized that I put too much sugar in it. Now, I had double the recipe since it was for a party, but I realized I had doubled the doubled amount of sugar. I crossed my fingers it would work, it didn't. They ended up in the trash



So I went to the store and got more butter, flour and sugar, then went about making them again. This time I did use the correct amounts but they still ended up looking horrible. They taste fine, but they are too ugly to even decorate for the party. Since I'm hoping for some commissions, no sense in bringing subpar goods. This is batch number 2.

Mar. 20th, 2011

squee

theonlytime

Is this a good knife sharpener?

I've been in the market for a knife sharper for a while now and noticed today's gold box deal on Amazon is the Chef's Choice 120 Diamond Hone 3-Stage Professional Knife Sharpener for $89.99 (normally $139.99). It has a lot of amazing reviews so I think i'm going to buy it, especially since it's on sale for today only. I was just curious if anyone here has personally used this one? Thanks in advance!

Feb. 21st, 2011


kerrys_neurons

edible, but ugly

This isn't exactly a failure because what I made is 100% edible! I decided to make a Chocolate Orange Loaf Cake (http://www.bhg.com/recipe/chocolate-cakes/chocolate-orange-loaf-cake/) I just happened to make a mistake in the prep work and I forgot to line my loaf pan with parchment paper. I went to remove the cake from the pan and it wouldn't come out, so when I finally managed to get it to come out a big chunk stayed in the pan! Needless to say I will always remember to line the pan with parchment!


PS I added a handful of chocolate chips to the recipe.

Feb. 1st, 2011


kerrys_neurons

Extra crispy cinnamon crispies

So this is another story from baking school.

The section that makes, danish, croissant, turnovers etc... pastries make these things called cinnamon crispies. Basically, its the scrap dough, with cinnamon sugar and rolled like a cinnamon roll then completely flattened, hence where you get the crispie name from. So I had bake them this morning. And you bake them for 8 minutes, then flip them and bake for another 8 minutes. No one told me when the timer went off the second time! One thing you learn while in baking school is learning to ignore the timer on the oven since they go off all the time. So you're like "oh yeah, that's mine!" I didn't hear the timer and this is what they ended up looking like


just a little dark!

Jan. 3rd, 2011


the_pyre

(no subject)

Hi! I'm new here!


Usually I cook and my boyfriend appreciates. Tonight the disaster started with boyfriend wanting to cook. We are also really poor right now, so ingredients are limited. Boyfriend comes up with a box of stuffing, a can of green beans and tofu.

Well tofu doesn't "match" so what to do? Bell's Turkey Seasoning! THAT's IT! So he sprinkles that on and goes to fry it up.

I was in the livingroom getting frustrated with the baby, so we decided to switch roles. I walk into the kitchen and it smells awful. Just putrid. What fixes everything? Well, canned marinara sauce! SCORE.

So I pour that on top and let it cook. It still smells terrible, but I had hope.

Now, the green beans were cooked with a boat load of garlic (garlic actually DOES fix everything), so they weren't so bad.

Anyway, my house now smells like rotten flesh.

Jan. 2nd, 2011

House

dogwoodblossom

Vegetable Tempura...Kind of

I've been getting home late the past few nights and have been eating fast food and left overs and Christmas candy for dinner. I had a craving for the awesome vegetable tempura that my favorite Thai place serves, but I figured I had all the ingredients at home and I wasn't too tired. I started prep at about 8 pm and that's what I'm blaming the failure on. I cut up my vegetables; broccoli, sweet potato, onion, and celery (an experiment). I didn't have any carrots or mushrooms or I would have thrown those in. I cut some tofu cubes and set them marinating in a simple garlic/ginger sauce while I mixed up my flour and breadcrumbs and beat some eggs. It was all going well.

I should point out that I have friend things successfully before. It's not particularly difficult. But for some reason tonight I spaced, so instead of dredging my vegetables in the egg, then the flour, I dumped the eggs into the panko bread crumbs and mixed that real well. About thirty seconds after I did it I realized I had screwed up. I had a big bowl full of dough. I didn't want to scrap it all and start over so I tried to mold the dough around the vegetables. It worked pretty well on the sweet potato slices and I was able to mash it into the top of the broccoli. I spread it in the groove of the celery like peanut butter. I couldn't get it to stick to the onions or tofu but I just decided to throw it all into the pan anyway.

It was all edible and the sweet potato and broccoli turned out pretty well actually but the presentation was a bit of a farce what with the chunks of fried dough mixed in with everything. And despite the fact that I added more spices than my recipe called for everything but the tofu was kind of bland. But once I drowned it all in Sirracha sauce it was actually pretty good.

Let me save you some time and warn you off the celery tempura though. The texture is all wrong.

Dec. 20th, 2010


kerrys_neurons

Thumbprint cookie screw-up

So I made probably the most obvious screw-up you could do with a thumbprint cookie recipe. Forget to do the thumbprint squishing part before baking! So after they were baked, I took the handle end of a wooden spoon to make the holes for the filling.


But you can't tell I screwed up when you see final product. Its a German Chocolate Thumbprints recipe btw.

Dec. 18th, 2010

wedding pic

catbirdgirl

not a failure YET I hope

One batch mint chocolate truffles, complete. Took the peanut butter filling out of the fridge to make truffles with... it was hard and cold! Cant roll truffles if it's hard and cold!
should I nuke it a bit, or should I just let it sit out and wait? It is composed of semisweet chocolate, coconut cream, peanut butter, and vanilla....

Dec. 16th, 2010

opeth

ey_up

(no subject)

I would think that completely forgetting to put the food in the oven would count as a cooking failure, wouldn't you? *facepalm*

Dec. 15th, 2010

knockyouout!

eternal_chimera

FAILBOAT blackies!

I found this wondderful brownie recipe, and I mixed it up and the batter was wonderful...

I just moved into my new place less than a month ago, and this was my first time TRYING to use the oven for baking. Maintenance is getting a call tomorrow.

I had the oven set for 250 degrees farenheit and I KNOW those brownies were not in there 15 minutes, more like 10. I HAD A WITNESS!



UUUM yeah... also the reason the inside is cooked at all is...once we had the charcooaled outer part, we left the Blackies on the stovetop with the oven on and let them "bake" the rest of the way!

The non charbroiled part was actually quite promising!

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